megalomanic
Categories: l33t
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I can imagine the following happening at Arc Systems:
Suit 1: We need to add a little boy to the game, since there’s already a little girl.
Suit 2: Great idea! Why not make this boy a nun? We don’t have one of those.
Suit 1: Isn’t Slayer the nun?
Suit 3: Well, that’s not a great name for a nun…
Suit 2: Then it’s settled. The little boy will be a nun. Slayer will be… the vampire. My kids seemed to dig Hellsing.
Suit 1: Ok, the boy will be a nun, but will act and sound like a little girl, but his life’s goal is to be a manly bounty hunter.
Suit 3: Good idea– I like that Cowboy Bebop angle. Except with the nun.
Suit 2: What about the name? How about Mario?
Suit 1: Nah… we need something that sounds British.
Suit 3: Hotsuma? Samus? Zwei?
Suit 2: Ayane? Hitomi? Christie?
Suit 1: Let’s just name him after my daughter, Bridget.
Suit 3: Bridget sounds both manly and British– perfect.
Suit 2: Bridget needs a weapon. Something original but befitting a nun.
Suit 3: How about a sword?
Suit 2: Nuns don’t use sharp objects…
Suit 3: What about a talking hat that sounds like Belldandy?
Suit 2: Mmmm– hold that though. I don’t think it’ll work with this character though.
Suit 3: Bridget can ride a dragon! And carry a pistol!
Suit 2: That’ll take us too long to animate.
Suit 1: I got it! Yo-yos! Who doesn’t like yo-yos? They’re just circles– it should be easy to anime. And teddy bears! And rollerblades! Oh– better yet– two yo-yos!
Suit 3: How about a yo-yo that turns into a teddy bear that rides a bike in a circle of fire?
Suit 2: I was just thinking the same thing. High5!
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The game can be extremely frustrating, and the computer difficulty seems to be fairly random. It took me zero continues to get through arcade hard as Eddie, and then the next game, it took me 10 tries as Bridget and 10 more tries as Eddie to beat it on normal. All of the defeats came at I-No, and it’s so cheap how her tension gauge fills up so fast– just like Testament and Dizzy in the previous game.
The missions and story mode are also pretty insane. Missions are next to impossible, but I managed to get through one just by spamming grand vipers. Story mode can be either extremely easy or extremely hard. Basically, if you are finding story mode to be easy, you’re on the easy path.
The M.O.M mode is kinda messed up because once you level up the medals to their max point value, it resets back to the lowest possible state in a “fever mode”. I found it easier to score points by finishing the stage with more health than by collecting medals.
