ph34r the little green men

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My day started normally — well, I severely overslept. Then I did some grocery shopping,
stared at my lab writeup, and then watched some Jubei-chan to pass the time
before I met up with my friend to see Episode II: Attack of the Clones. We had
tickets for the 10:30PM showing in San Jose, but we were meeting for dinner at a sushi
place (totemo oshii) at 6:15PM. The sushi place was next to the theater, so we were
in line by 7:30PM. Three hours early, and the line was already long enough to wrap
around the parking lot.

The theather holds 1,400 people, and we were about 800 or 900th in line. Crazy. Insane.
Loco. Atamaga ga warui. Fa fong. People were mostly eating and sitting on chairs while
waiting. Unlike opening night for Episode I, we didn’t see any costumed people,
though many people were having mock lightsabers duels in the parking lot, and a few people
had posters/cutouts. Han Solo and Boba Fett were very popular.

Vastly different than opening night for Spiderman two weeks ago. We were about
an hour early, and there were only — maybe — a dozen or two people in front of us.
It was also a 10-ish showing. I prefer later showings to minimize the little kiddie
factor, plus most people work on Fridays so it’s mostly college/high school students
who go at this time. Basically, the loudest, dorkiest fans.
It’s San Jose. Silicon Valley. The group behind us were from the Legends shop
in the nearby mall. They were still wearing their nametags. Dorks. =) The group
ahead of us brought laptops and Macworld magazines. They were running Excel — if it’s
not geek for you, I don’t know what is.

The theater people gave out free “Yoda Soda” which was cheap, warm Safeway cola, but
I drank it anyway. For Episode I, we got Darth Maul cutouts.
There were huge messes in the parking lot. People littered like mad, and the pavement
was sticky with cola and beer.
Oh, well. Around
10:00PM, they let us in, and it was a mad rush for seats. My group of seven got broken
up because there just wasn’t a clump of seven seats together. Mine was in the middle
row-wise, but towards the right-hand side. People resorted
to standing room space.
Once seated, I noticed a beach ball being
tossed around, and people were trying to whack at it with lightsabers. It was highly
amusing, especially when they miss and whack someone by mistake.

The previews started at 10:30PM, and there were only 3. Minority Report which
people cheered. It looked like a recycled/more violent version of AI. Then
came MIB 2 which people also cheered. Lemmings I tell you. Finally, there
was the Matrix Reloaded and Matrix Revolution trailers. People were
going crazy until the Fandango ad appeared. Then the mass booing began.

The cheering erupted once more after the drumroll and the Lucasarts logo appeared.
It immediatedly stopped once the text started scrolling. Clones was just a
lot of fun to watch. The whole theater was ooohhh-ing and aaahhh-ing in unison.
Incredible. There were even catcalls when Anakin makes his moves on Amidala. Surprisingly,
it only added (instead of detracting) from the movie experience.

My favorite part, though, was the end. Spoilers coming up so stop reading if you don’t
want to be spoiled. After the Jedi strike force got surrounded, Yoda descends down
in gunships with stormtroopers. He was commanding stormtroopers. There was a complete
mystified look on the people around me. I felt it too. Then, during the final lightsaber
battle between Yoda and Count Dooku, the whole theather erupted into full-blown pandemonium.
People were just going crazy. The last time I’ve seen an audience act like this was when
Michigan beat Ohio State in 97 to go onto the Rose Bowl. Terribly insane, and I joined
them. Ph34r Yoda’s m4d skillz.

This is why I go to see movies. To me, the movie was only part of the experience.
Everything put together — great sushi, time with friends, near-riot conditions — that’s
what makes it fun and memorable. You don’t get this experience watching American Beauty
or The Sixth Sense. I don’t even remember what theater I saw The Sixth Sense in,
but I can give you every detail of my Episode II viewing.
It’s enjoyment. It’s not thinking. It’s now winning awards.
It’s about making people happy, and Clones did just that, and it did it in spades.

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