hanasaku iroha 3
Categories: episodic review, hanasaku iroha
Tagged: hanasaku iroha
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“Balut”
“I’ll teach you everything, not only things related to the inn.”
“I want to sparkle.”
“Let us rub you up, and you’ll be sparkling in no time.”
“We’re rubbing each other in inappropriate places with the mop, but…”
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Oh yes.
And emo facial distortion? Yes. Oh yes.
(My question? A mop? I’m sure there’s more clever ways of getting a few nublie haremettes to rub each other. What kind of author uses a mop? Let me show you how it is done…)
[Scene: Nako and Ohana are in the locker area to the women’s bath.]
Ohana: You were really cool today, jumping off the cliff and saving Jiro.
Nako: Th… thank you. It was nothing.
Ohana: No, no, it was amazing. I didn’t know that about you, but now I am glad to learn something new about you.
Nako: I… I…
Ohana: No need to apologize. [Smile] You do look a bit tired. And you must be sore. Let me rub your shoulders. I won’t take “no” for an answer. [Blinks]
Nako turns away from Ohana and drops down her waitress uniform, exposing her shoulders. Ohana takes her hands and places them on Nako’s shoulders but pauses to feel their warmth and softness. Ohana then proceeds to rub the senior waitress’s shoulders, slowly and shallowly at first, but then she starts digging her hands into Nako’s shoulders deeper. And deeper. And deeper.
Mako: Uh… Ohana-chan… that’s a bit…
Ohana: Sorry… did I hurt you?
Nako: [Sheepishly] It’s okay. It’s fine. [Pause] Can you go down a bit more?
Ohana: Like this?
Ohana starts running Nako’s shoulders across more of her back, and when she reaches her hands to Nako’s front, Ohana’s hands almost extend down to Mako’s chest. But Ohana tumbles a bit…
Ohana: Sorry, I think my uniform is getting in my way. I can’t reach as far as I would like.
Ohana wipes the sweat off of her forehead and takes off her uniform in one deft motion. All that time mopping floors is now beginning to show its use… wax on, wax off. She tosses it to the side, and quickly gets back to rubbing Nako’s back.
Nako: [Turns her head around slightly] Okay… [turns her head back as she feels Ohana’s warm hands encroaching on her chest] ahhh…
Ohana: [Not really sorry] Sorry…
Nako: [Blushing] No, it’s okay… [turns her head towards Ohana] do you really want to sparkle?
Ohana: [Breathing heavier] Yes… [moves her mouth closer to Nako’s ear] I do…
Ohana gently bites the edge of Nako’s ear, upon feeling this, Nako becomes flushed and pulls away a bit. She turns around completely, facing Ohana, and pulls down the rest of her waitress outfit to her navel.
Nako: [Coy] If you’ll have me…
Nako moves her head closer to Ohana’s, and Ohana can clearly see every reflection of light off of Nako’s moist lips… and… and… readers of blog好ã’s premium subscriber service gets the rest of this entry.
“Why am I being taught by the girl I confined… ?”
Next month’s premium subscriber bonus story is about a perverted author who kidnaps young waitresses and uses them to make bondage videos for nico nico douga. Don’t miss a minute of this heart-pounding story! Subscribe now.
(I do regret this episode airing a week after I wrote “top ten best/worst anime phrases to scream during climax“. “I am sparkling!” would definitely be in the top five. And for the readers who got ahead-err–behind of themselves, “My drill is a drill that can pierce the heavens” is something you say way at the beginning of the process, not at the end. As in “As Ohana grabs the handle to the mop, she screams ‘My drill is a drill that can pierce the heavens!'”)
OH GEASS NO!
My favorite part of Nako diving into the water? This. Second favorite part? Making all the Baywatch jokes… “She has ample melonpan… she dives in feet first in perfect form… she can swim… she is wearing a revealing white top… how is she not running in slow motion in the OP?”
(If PA Works did a parody of Baywatch using the Hanasaku Iroha cast with the grandma in place for the final Hasselhoff cut, I would have thin sliced it #1. Too bad. I really do like this show, but PA Works track record is like the Buffalo Bills from 1990 to 1993. Kyoto is more like Patriots in 2001.)
As I predicted, Hanasaku Iroha is the evolutionary GTO crossed with some Devil Wears Prada. Grandma is very similar to the academy director in that they both brought in a wild card hoping to fix things wrong with their establishments. Much like Onizuka, Ohana does things in unexpected ways… she went along with a creeper who was writing sexual fantasies about her! If Onizuka were a 16 year old girl, he would have done the same thing.
(Only in this blog would “if Onizuka were a 16 year old girl” be a valid and accepted reference. Along with the 1990s Buffalo Bills.)
See, in America, if a hotel patron refused to pay his bill, he would be beaten up by a collection agency. If he also sexually harassed a minor by locking her up and tying her up in rope, he would be charged with sexual assault of a minor and be forced to register with the sexual offender database. In anime, he gets away scott free because he wears a bathrobe while trying to look cool on a rock.
(Needless to say, if you ever see a House Hunters International episode about an engineer from Silicon Valley relocating to Japan’s rural, non-Fukushima area to write the next great novel, it could be me. Or any of the hundreds of others reading this post and nodding right now.)
(Andohbytheway, doesn’t the author just remind you of a homeless man’s Anthony Bourdain?)
This chase scene puts Initial D to shame. Of course, I’m talking about the chase of Toru trying to catch up with the van. But I did hope that the hachiroku would pull out from that tofu shop and burn rubber. Would have moved this show up to #1 for thin slicing for me.
“So you’re the MVP of today.”
My MVPs?
1. Nako’s melonpan.
2. Ohana being Ohana.
3. Jiro’s imagination. He now qualifies to write for Game of Thrones.
“Dozo! Have a starfish~”
12 Responses to “hanasaku iroha 3”
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Free HanaIro fanfiction with my anime blogging? Tis a good day.
why must they do this episode so poorly? but seems like you were enjoying it
Ohana is a friggin’ Pollyanna. If it weren’t for Minko I’d have dropped this show already.
I was thinking the exact same thing about the writer… The writer admits to taking inspiration for his erotic novel from a trio of high school girls… and not only do the inn people accept that, but they offer him a job working with said girls. Oh my. Where do I sign up?
Whew, that erotic sequence was makin’ it a lil’ hot in hurrr, sign me up for AoMM premium service………..
WOW, I still have this labeled as AoMM on RSS, damn……
sign me up, I want the rest of “Kagayaki no Ohana”
So where is the premium subscriber button?
Hell, we don’t need the author to imagine all of that ! I actually think Nako wants to jump Ohana (from the beginning). That’s not too far fetched, guys. What else can make a girl blush so badly and make such weird noises when facing Ohana ?
Putting the subscriber break before collapsing the trap waveform, I see. Clever.
So that’s what happened to Yamakan after Fractale.
Hah! No more nightly fanfiction for you young man….
.
Guess Ohana now has a “good” story to text her best friend. “Got kidnapped, gagged and bound turtle style today…” is always an interesting start to any text message.
Premium blog好ã? SHUT UP AND TAKE MY MONEY.