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Sep 01 2011

Categories: episodic review, nichijou
Tagged: nichijou

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“Sakamoto-san, dogs. We might get bitten.”

This was awesome. Reminded me of Evangelion when Shinji is lining up for a snipe for whatever reason. Just that much pure destructive energy.

Of course, the look on Professor and Sakamoto-san. Awesome. Pure awesome.

“People die when they are eaten.”

I kept laughing during this whole sequence– from Professor’s doom and gloom prognostication (that in Nichijou style, came true) to Sakamoto-san getting hung from his noose to Mai trolling everyone with her dogs to Yuko being Yuko to, well, everything. Just Nichijou being Nichijou the same way Chris Johnson being Chris Johnson when he runs for 142 yards and a touchdown.

The best part, of course, is Mai bribing Professor with chocolate sharks to forget about this incident. It just fits: Mai escaping with minimal damage (even though she trolled everyone), Professor being a kid and forgetting about everything with a cheap bribe, Yuko and Mio writhing in pain, and poor Sakamoto-san forgotten.

(I was going to make an analogy about how it’s like Gainax unleashed whiny Shinji Ikari on us before issuing Simon as an apology almost a decade later. Fanboys can be easily appeased… K-ON! concert?! Fuwa fuwa time forever!)

“If it’s a shark that you want, it’s a cheap price to pay.”

Poor Sakamoto-san. He should have been a crow. Just a few days ago, a friend just started talking about how clever and devious crows are. Then I listened to a TED topic about crows. My gosh. I’m scared. It’s not apes or dolphins that will take over the earth– it is crows. We need to watch out for them. Especially any that sound like Itsuki.

(Andohbytheway, this episode has to be Sakamoto-san’s finest performance. Just the range of acting…)

(Also disappointed that Kyoto didn’t put a disclaimer: “DO NOT DO THIS TO YOUR PETS!” If this episode aired in America, it would cause a shitstorm.)

Isn’t what Mohawk-san trying to do entrapment? Or at least some sort of biasing the experiment to get the results that he wants? And don’t normal scientists do research like curing cancer, investigating frequency tuning of wide temperature range CMOS LC VCOs, developing stronger metals, or tracking migratory habits of wildlife? What kind of scientist goes around debunking ghost stories? I’ll tell you who: all the people on Ghost Hunters International, Paranormal Challenge, Destination Truth, Ghost Adventures, etc… who aren’t scientists and just are actors doing cheap time-filling reality TV. How do I know this without actually visiting any of these places? Because on each and every one of these shows, all the ghosts speak English. Yes, English is the universal language of “ghosts.”

(Unless “ghosts” = production intern… mmm…)

Also, for most paranormal activity, Occam’s Razor. The simplest explanation is best. Gundam only exists to sell plastic toys. The “ghost” is just the wind. The reason you look nothing like your dad is because that ain’t your (biological) dad. K-On! is getting a motherfucking movie because it makes motherfucking loads of money. The scary silhouette is just a tree branch illuminated by the full moon. The guy taking nakkid pictures of you in the shower is taking nakkid pictures of you in the shower.

I could guessed that Sakamoto-san would be hit by the sword based on: (a) it’s Sakamoto-san (b) there’s no way Mio’s sister would get hit (c) someone will get hit. Damn, guessed wrong, but the instructor would be number two target in my book. Can we get Yoshino to guest star on Bamboo Blade? I feel like she’s a natural fit for that show as well.

“Don’t give up! If you do, it’s over!”

Inspiring words. Much like the ice cream and meat bun scene proceeding this one, their hope gets slowly crushed… slowly. Nichijou is like Walking Dead in that Walking Dead slowly crushes the hopes of the protagonists while stringing them along… and giving them just enough hope to keep going and to get more hope sucked away from them. In that sense, both of these series follow the Kyubey Entropy Recovery Law: leave just enough hope to extract greater despair.

“Buddy! Kobuddy! What are you doing?!”

The shiba inu are groping the little girls’ asses! Perverts!

“People live by helping each other, Takashi. This holds true with animals, Takashi.”

Best part of this scene is how grandpa wears a top hat and grandson wears a baseball cap. I feel like it’s a generational message.

(The name gag was great. Typical left field Nichijou moment that flowed natural.)

Five second rule! Five second rule! Scientists don’t investigate ghosts– they drop bologna on the floor and record bacterial transfer.

Just how many dai-fucking-fuku fairs does this town have?! And how many have been sold thus far? Zero or zero?

“In that case, I want two packs of eggs, half a kg of beef, a picture by Ivan Bilibin…”

Nano just looks so happy and adorable as she lists out her Christmas list. Just so heart-breaking to see Professor cockblock her. Ridiculous Christmas lists always reminds me of… And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, the first would be the crap about the kids definitely, the second would be for the 30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year to have an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought out slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina-somebody, I can’t think of her name. Of course my lovely wife can come too and she’s behind me one hundred percent here, I guarantee it.

(I think this Ivan Bilibin work suits Nano well.)

“Just for the very, very end, you want a happy ending.”

So true. #Kyubey

Three MVPs…

1. Sakamoto-san.
2. Professor.
3. To all the dogs. “There were a lot of dogs.”