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Oct 01 2013

Categories: episodic review, monogatari
Tagged: monogatari

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“Vampire punch!”

(Monogatari Series Second Season thirteen. My favorite scene from the episode. What exactly made it a “vampire punch”? It looks like a standard fdf+punch move from any fighting game. I think I prefer “Donut punch!” or “Lolicon punch!” since both fit the characters involved better than a generic “Vampire punch!” “Vampire punch!” is like naming a TV show “Scandal” or “Damages.”)

“That was a close one. He was this close to breaking a city area ordinance. That’s a relief.”

Up to this point, the only haremette that Araragi hasn’t shown any interest in is Nadeko (totally clueless during Nisemono’s Twister scene), and, suddenly, he’s proposing that they sleep in the same bed together? Seems a bit out of character. You could argue that Araragi is just joking, and that he’ll end backing out at the last minute, assuming Nadeko immediately strip nakkid and assume the “paint me like a French girl” pose. Except. Araragi hasn’t joked with Nadeko. He’s joked with Kanbaru and Mayoi, but not with Nadeko. He’s seriously considered Senjougahara and Hanekawa, but not Nadeko. I thought Nadeko would be the control case in his harem, but I guess I’m wrong. Araragi is just a horndog. In other words, a normal teenaged boy. Which is the opposite of most male harem leads.

“You were just about to raise a child at your age.”

Two more thoughts on this scene. One, I feel like Shaft missed an opportunity to have Shinobu cross her legs a la Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct here. He’s in a similar position of power, and how often do anime haremettes cross their legs? Did this happen in forty episodes of Amagami? Two, I have an idea for a harem game. The setting is post-WW2 London. The country is rebuilding, and you play as a male nurse who goes around helping pregnant war widows through their childbirth. You’d get to know the haremettes as you check up on them before they give birth, the birth would be a big flag event, and then you have the chance to woo them afterwards. No, I totally did not steal this idea from a British drama.

Architecture! Architecture! Architecture!

(I was thinking earlier that it would be cool if someone made a GTA-like game except it took place in a fantasy realm. You’d jack unicorns and dragons while using spells and swords for weapons. But now I’m thinking I want GTA in a Shinbo designed city… maybe even this city where Monogatari takes place in. It is interesting architecturally, and it has level design built in. I am just full of ideas today.)

Nadeko chatting with her snake oddity is by far the most boring thing to happen in this series since most Tsukhiki scenes from Nisemonogatari. Good thing it only dragged on for half an episode rather than a whole episode. Sometimes, Nisio Isin tries to be too cute with dialogue and forgets that he needs to tell a story instead of explaining a story in a roundabout way. It’s what separates the The X-Files season 3 from Heroes season 3.

(Infinite desk works!)

Araragi wouldn’t mind if Mayoi and Nadeko recreated Madoromi no Yakusoku.

“How big is it?”

No innuendo here! None!

So Araragi has a crappy candy bar phone that can’t even text, and his little sister gets an iPhone? Also, isn’t it a bit odd neither Tsukihi nor Karen greeted Nadeko or even volunteered to share their super spacious room with her? Tsukihi is enough of a friend that Nadeko’s family’s calls her, yet she doesn’t talk to her after she gets to the Araragi house? I’m also a bit baffled how Tsukihi doesn’t go, “Uh, you two know each other? Wait, why is she going to your room alone?!” Do the Fire Sisters have the night off?

“Naturally cute.”

One thing that has been great this season is the haremettes calling each other out on their bullshit. I enjoyed Senjougahara calling out Hanekawa (quite possibly the season’s highlight), and I enjoyed Shinobu calling out Nadeko here. Rawr. Though how Shinobu describes Nadeko can also describe my puppy when she is hungry… especially when she’s begging for peanut butter treats.

Liked how Araragi corrected guessed Nadeko’s predicament. I don’t know if he actually knows, or was that just a comedic wild guess moment… who knows with Araragi? His competence level dithers based on the story he is currently in. He’s not always competent a la Keiichi Morisato or always incompetent a la Tomoki Sakurai. He’s exactly the correct amount of competence as dictated by the story.

If the snake had white earbuds, this could be a mid-2000s iPod ad.

(For shits and giggles, I googled “iSnake,” and, apparently, it’s a thing.)

Valve didn’t announce Half Life 3 last week, but they apparently trademarked it. My prediction wasn’t that far off. Three predictions for next episode…

1. Characters that won’t appear: Tsukihi, Karen, Kanbaru, Hanekawa, Mayoi, and Kaiki. May appear: Senjougahara, Ougi, and Jacksonville’s defense.

2. Incoming nerfs for Batrider.

3. The US government shutdown will end once Congress realize that shutdowns mean fewer blow and hooker parties.