inaugural hawt girl on girl action power rankings™

少女愛… does it ever get old?

Since I’m still waiting for the Shana meido to appear before updating the Meido Power Rankings™, I decided to quell my power rankin’ urges with the debut of Hawt Girl on Girl Action Power Rankings™. As the name implies, the hawtness of various girl on girl pairings will be ranked; for example, Tamami pining for Kozue would be not hawt but racing down a freeway nakkid at 180MPH while making out would be uber-hawt. The list is based off of what actually happens, or else the FSN girls would destroy the competition. It’s probably more accurate and less fanboyish if I called this list the “Shoujo-Ai Power Rankings™” but… nah… since when have I said that I wasn’t a fanboy? ^^

(I get the strange feeling that this post will lead to a lot of dissappointed visitors from google searching for “lesbian anime doujinshi” or “shoujo-ai doujinshi”.)

Omissions

Tamami/Kozue (Mahoraba) — Nothing here. I mean nothing. The only hope is if Tamami kills Shiratori and pulls a Shizuru. I just don’t see that happening.

Nobue/The Underaged Cast (Ichigo Mashimaro) — If I actually ranked this one, I’m sure Hell Girl would show up and immediately ferry me to hell. I’m not taking that chance.

DQ’ed

Natsuo/Rina/Randou (Pretty Face) — One of them is a man, baby!

Hazumu/Yasuna/Tomari (Kashimashi Girl Meets Girl) — One of them is a man, baby! Okay, was a man.

Hawt Girl on Girl Action Power Rankings™

  1. Utena/Anthy (Utena) — The omega, from which all hawt girl on girl action are wrought. (BTW, everyone seems to remember the scene at the end where Utena and Anthy are nakkid on the sled/car, but the genius imagery goes to the scene before that when Utena was still the car and Anthy is trying to drive Utena through that threaded crevice. That should say it all.)
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  2. Natsuki/Shizuru (Mai Hime) — I think Mai Hime would be a pretty ordinary and forgettable series without the Natsuki/Shizuru interaction, and I’m thinking that Gundam Seed Destiny would be the greatest Gundam series ever if they repeated Natsuki/Shizuru with Lacus/Meer. I can just imagine a crazed Meer hijacking Destiny and owning Kira/Athrun going, “I LOVE YOU LACUS!!!!!” In fact, let’s make this happen, somehow.
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  3. Rin/Saber (Fate/Stay Night) — Most. Yuri. Doujinshis. Ever. (Ranking pending on how well the anime does, of course.)
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  4. Yu Lan/Yu Fan (TSR) — Major points for twincest. Major points for nakkid shower scene. But I’m sticking them at 4 because they weren’t the reason why TSR was awesome whereas the top 3 choices were the reason why their series were awesome.
  5. Hazuki/Hatsuki (Yami to Boushi) — Hazuki and Hatsuki make reading fun. Honestly, this series suffers from the worst title in recent memory. Nothing about a book, a hat, or a traveler sparks imagery of lesbian fanservice. After Hazuki/Hatsuki, there seems to be a drop-off in hawtness… oh, well.
  6. Kirie/Kozame (Girls Bravo) — The best part of the whole series.
  7. Chikane/Himeko (Kannazuki no Miko) — This series was bad enough that not even copious amounts of fanservice and girl on girl action could hold my interest. That means something: not enough hawtness in the girl on girl action.
  8. Izumi/Anna (He Is My Master) — Since most of the stories seem to focus on Mitsuki inventing some weird game/competition, I think that the series would have done much better as an Iron Chef rip-off… I can imagine Yoshitaka clutching an Ana doll and, with a snide smile, say, “Tonight’s main ingredient… Izumi.” Pochi would be the Iron Chef, and Anna would be the challenger.
  9. Entire Cast (Maria-sama ga Miteru ) — I’ll let Senbei handle this one. Too much drama.
  10. Mutsumi/Naru (Love Hina) — Kinda sad that these two have gotten farther than most of this list.
  11. Natsumi/Koyuki (Keroro Gunso) — They need to “take the next step” and really move up the rankings, but, alas, they seem to be retargeting Keroro Gunso for a younger audience, much to my dismay.
  12. Jura/Barnette (Vandread) — *sob* Jura cheated on her… with a man! *sob*
  13. Shinobu/Kaede (2×2 Shinobuden) — Naive, innocent love. Unless, of course, if Onsakumaru is involved. Then it’s the wild, crazy, and kinky stuff.
  14. Setsuna/Konoka (Negima) — More cute than hawt. Manga could use more Setsuna x Konoka and less Negima x his Y4L friend.
  15. Tatsuki/Orohime/Chizuru/Matsumoto (Bleach) — Fantastic line-up trapped in a Toriyama series. Too bad Bleach jumped the shark a long time ago.
  16. Kitagawa/Mika (Sensei no Ojikan) — More like a mother tormenting her child. Rei/Becky would be hotter, but, alas.
  17. Nancy/Yoriko (R.O.D.) — The non-hawt book based series.
  18. Kaorin/Saki (Azumanga) — Poor ranking due to better odds of Kimura x Kaorin action.

8 Responses to “inaugural hawt girl on girl action power rankings™”

  1. You should remove the Yu Lan and Yu Fan one since they originally guys in the novel. They should be DQ because of it.

  2. Jura cheated on Barnette?!? I must have missed on that one. Don’t tell me Jura centered her “affections” on Bart?

  3. @phoenix512: Who cares, they exist don’t they? I absoulutely loved the twincests for injecting in the much needed yuri appeal for FMP.

    @bakaboobie: Well, in the end of Vandread, Jura demanded for a baby from a GUY, right. I’d say that counts as cheating.

  4. I’m surprised YamBou came before Kannazuki, I can’t figure out which one is more of a disappointment. Did you flip a coin? I don’t know if it’s a good thing to have the patience to get through a series just for the fan-service, but I guess I don’t care ^_^; Your list made me laugh.

  5. Travesty! Yamibou was awesome :P

  6. well i liked mai hime even though it had a terrible ending

  7. ai ya…maria sama stands so low on ur list when it would have stood alot higher on mine. though maybe it was the pointed artwork that u didn’t find hot.

    didn’t strawberry panic make it onto ur list? its another pretty famose on. and Noir too.

    as for ROD. I thought Nancy was pretty hot!

  8. Wait, no Strawberry Panic? How could you!

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